Some things stand as obstacles when you attempt to move forward, but if you are going to change anything, you have to close the loophole. This change will help you shift the outcome from positive to negative. However, this is easier said than done; confronting situations positively and forgiving what you can’t forget.
The power of closing the loophole: 10 ways to positively confront what you need to in your life
If you want to ensure that the loophole that is negatively affecting your life stays closed, the best option is to confront them. Care enough to confront the situation.
How to quickly and positively confront
If confrontation is done with respect and the person’s best interest at heart, it will be a win-win. It’s not about what you say but how you say it.
1 Confront it quickly. ASAP
The longer you wait, the worse it becomes. Immediately face what it is you need to resolve before it sits for too long. Don’t wait till next week or the new year – do it now.
2 Address the wrong action, not the person
When you decide to talk it out, focus on the action, not the person. Don’t say, ‘you are a bad person.’ You won’t solve anything that way.
3 Don’t attack
Similar to the previous point, don’t attack the person. You certainly don’t want to feel attacked, so don’t do it. Attacking only perpetuates the loophole. The result of a positive confrontation is to resolve, not to fuel the anger.
4 Confront what the person can change only
Don’t go about saying that one person’s attitude is so bad. In the same way, don’t talk about the past. No one can change what happened yesterday, and certainly years ago; this is why forgiving what you can’t forget is important. Don’t whine about how hurt you were about an experience. Focus on what can be changed – the future.
5 Give the person the benefit of the doubt.
No, they are not the devil. Whatever behavior a person portrays is influenced by their experience. So please give them the benefit of the doubt. Don’t assume and conclude that they cannot change or is immune to goodness.
6 Be specific
Don’t beat around the bush. Refrain from straying as well. Make a bullet point to help keep your points specific.
7 Only about you and me – don’t talk about any other person
If you are two in the conversation, limit your examples and discussion to those two people. Don’t include any other person. It does not concern them.
8 Avoid sarcasm
Avoid making jokes or including sarcasm. They don’t make things better and fuel anger in the other person, again only perpetuating the loophole. Sarcasm can also be a passive-aggressive way of attacking the other person.
9 Indulge only in Mature and honest conversations about things that matter
Don’t try to play the victim, and don’t let your emotions take the best of you. Focus on the confrontation’s goal, which should lead you to a positive outcome. Hence, agree to disagree.
10 Forgiving what you can’t forget and positively confront
Before you go ahead to confront, first, forgive who needs to be forgiven. Suppose it’s the other person. Make sure that you have forgiven them genuinely from the heart. If it is you, forgive yourself. Forgiveness must happen for the confrontation to be positive.
Conclusion: Eliminating the loophole to elevate your life
Learning how to confront positively is a powerful tool. It’s hard to grow when you are carrying around negative emotions. If you don’t close the loophole, it comes out when you are triggered. Let things go – release bad stuff, and practice the art of forgiving what you can’t forget.